Our trip to the mountains went wrong!

The day when everything went wrong was last Saturday. I went camping to the mountains with my friends Charles and Jenny. We had decided to travel by train, because it was way too far away and we rarely  

During the trip, we had a serious problem, a hilarious parrot that was inside the train escaped from his cage and Charles, filled with fear, ended up falling and hurting himself. After we arrived to the place, everyone was hungry so we decided to go camping anyways. The moment we saw the views from up there were amazing, we felt though we were flying. After that, is when Jenny realized we had forgotten the tents in the train!

In consequence of that grave issue, I and my friend decided it was better to postpone the trip to another day. Thankfully, when we were coming back from the mountains, a man in the train station gave us the tents we had forgotten back then.

Now, I´m preparing all the things to go again to the journey in the mountains. This time we are not going to forget anything.

Fecha: 13/6/2021 | Creado por: Maximo
Categoria: Story
  • Marina hace 5 meses
    The story is clearly connected to the first sentence the task specifies. Great!
    The two things the task specifies have been included. x (and the meal out???)
    There is a clear beginning, middle and end. Great!
    The tenses are appropriate for the story? Past Tenses: Past Simple -cont. - Perfect Great!
    There is direct speech. x
    The story has been divided into paragraphs. Great!
    Punctuation is ok Great!
    There’s a wide variety of linkers. Great!
    Time phrases have been used to show a clear sequence. Great!
    There are adjectives to talk about people/things Great! You didn't use adverbs to talk about actions x
    There are no similes (I felt as though I was going to die) ok
    and we rarely ...?
    We felt as though we were flying
    serious issue